Dorbi’s Bake Off EP is the freaky, flour-dusted fantasy we never knew we needed. Five tracks, three languages, nine minutes of pure, unhinged culinary kink, and yes, it somehow works. From the opening slap of “Never Measure,” Dorbi makes it clear this isn’t your grandma’s baking soundtrack. With bass that thumps like a stand mixer on speed and bars in Hebrew that refuse to play by any culinary rules, it’s bold, brash, and has the chaotic energy of someone who definitely burns the first batch on purpose just to prove a point.
Then comes “Cake on Your Face,” where the kitchen gets messier, darker, and way more suggestive. Inspired by a Grindr cake fetishist (yes, really), it is a trip through a fever dream bakery where nothing is safe and the frosting is weaponized.
Just when you think you’ve adjusted, “Galletita” hits—suddenly you’re in a Spanish reggaeton sugar rush with Dorbi crooning “Quieres ser mi galletita?” like the world’s horniest pastry chef. It’s snappy, sparkly, and makes you want to grind while eating shortbread. Or maybe that’s just Dorbi’s fault.
“Cookie” follows, featuring rapper Tom Schneid and a klezmer-style accordion that sounds like a Jewish wedding crashed by a rage rapper. But the final slice is “Topless Bread Party.” A sweaty, thumping EDM club banger for carb-lovers who like their beats buttered and their buns out. It’s so over-the-top it’s practically a religion. There’s yeast, there’s heat, there’s no shirt required. If you aren’t dancing by the second “Heating up, heating up, heating up,” are you even alive?
Bake Off is filthy, fabulous, and flour-powered. If you’re into carbs, chaos, and absurdly catchy hooks, Dorbi’s just served you dessert with a side of sexual awakening.
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Photo Credit: Bruce Melan
Review by: Naomi Joan